7 Steps to a Happy Godly Relationship

1. Accept.

Accept your partner for who he/she is. Accept that they have limitations and strengths. Accept that they are not perfect. They cannot meet your expectations. They will let you down. Stop holding on to your idealistic picture and imaginations of what your beloved must be like. Accept him or her simply for what they are in real life.

Can the Ethiopian change his skin, Or the leopard his spots? Jeremiah 13:23

2. Flow.

Flow with the ways things are. Flow with your partner’s moods. Be happy when they are happy. Be sad when they are sad. Comfort him or her when he or she needs you. Learn to just flow. Respect the seasons and understand there is a time for everything under the sun. If you feel the wind moving in a certain direction, you flow with it.

A good sailor learns to read the direction of the wind and just sail in the same.

And when the ship was caught, and could not bear up into the wind, we let her drive. Acts 27:15

3. Don’t presume, ask.

It helps not to jump to conclusions. When in doubt, it’s better to ask. Ask your questions in a soft manner without presuming anything and without an accusatory tone. You may never know limited! Try as much as possible to give the benefit of the doubt! It will save you from looking like a fool just incase you are wrong. Ask questions when you do not understand things. Not all your questions may be answered but at least you will know that you tried. Even God says, “come now let us reason together.” You must reason with your partner and not accuse them.

Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord:

though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow;

though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. Isaiah 1:18

4. Believe the best

Believe in the best outcome for your relationship. Have faith that things will work out for your good. Believe your partner is God’s best for you at this time. Believe that your partner is doing his or her best for you. Believe what your partner says to you. Believe that your partner loves you and respond to that love.

Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. 1 Corinthians 13:7

5. Concentrate, focus and fight to be happy

Concentrate on your partner and don’t think of any other. Focus on your partner’s strengths. This will allow you to go for the gold. This will allow you to relax and have a good time enjoying each other. Fight to be happy. Focus on finding ways to enjoy the union that God has made possible (of course in a manner that gives glory to God)

Focus on making each other happy. Fight to have peace. You might have to forget some of your petty disagreements. Remember that you choose what you want to see. So choose to see the good. The book Song of Songs contains the powerful expressions of lovers who have focused on the things they love about each other.

Not all is perfect, the lady even says to her lover,

Look not upon me, because I am black,

because the sun hath looked upon me:

my mother’s children were angry with me;

they made me the keeper of the vineyards;

but mine own vineyard have I not kept. Song of Songs 1:6

But he responds saying,

Behold, thou art fair, my love; behold, thou art fair;

thou hast doves’ eyes. Song of Songs 1:15

6. Pray

Without prayer we are nothing! Pray for your relationship and surely if it is God’s will, He will make it beaufitul in His own time!

I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase. 1 Corinthians 3:6

7. Honor and trust God

Accept that God is in control of your relationship. Submit it to Him and honor Him in all you do, especially with your bodies. Put away worry and trust that if He started it, He will bring it to completion!

I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth it, that men should fear before him. Ecclesiastes 3:14

Single and Serving

Your mindset as a young single Christian must be– I am single so I must serve. I am not living to please a man or a woman so I must live a life that pleases God.

“But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.” -1 Corinthians 7:32, 34

Your mindset must not be, since I am single, I must focus on praying for a beloved. By all means pray to God to direct your life and lead you, pray for a good marriage and children who will grow in the fear of the Lord. But do not spend all your time and focus your thoughts on getting a beloved. As you serve the Lord, do you think He will not take care of you? This is your biggest mistake. Watch the things you listen to and watch. Are they constantly focused on relationships and marriage?

You are single because God is giving you a special privilege to use your time for Him, give undivided attention to Him and direct heartfelt devotion towards His work. You are single because right now, God wants all of you. He wants you to be able to make decisions based on Him, not on another’s (your spouse or beloved’s) preferences or desires.

Think about the special privileges of someone who is single. Your time is not in constant demand by a spouse or family. Your heart is not captured and being subjected to hurt and offenses from a spouse. Your money is not held up in a tight budget for diapers and food for the family.

With this time, you can develop your talents. With such a free and willing heart, you can worship God in abandon. With your money, you can give to the cause of the gospel. You can sow seeds. You can live.

“And when I passed by thee, and saw thee polluted in thine own blood, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live; yea, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live.” -Ezekiel 16:6

God is saying to you, live. He sees how polluted you are. He sees the mistakes you’ve made. The pain you’ve felt, trying one relationship after another. But forget the past and press on. Press on toward the mark of the high calling. Press on to serve God. LIVE. Your singleness is your gift to God. It’s your special time, to give special gifts, to have special intimacy with God and take special decisions only because of God. So give it.

Brother, why are you paralyzed?

“Some men are paralysed into indefinite bachelorhood because they are looking for the perfect female. There is no such thing. Some of the so-called beauties come with horrible flaws.”

Excerpt From: Dag Heward-Mills. “The Art of Leadership.” Dag Heward-Mills.

1. You are paralyzed because you can’t be decisive 

Great leadership and great progress in life comes with great decision-making. Your inability to make decisions at the right time will cost you. Jacob decided very early that he would like to marry Rachel. With this in mind, he worked diligently towards it. Bishop says, most decisions are between two bad choices anyway. Learn to choose the lesser evil and choose early! Just as when you are driving and need to cease lanes, you look for a gap and cease the moment. Cease the opportunity, don’t let it pass you by! Don’t look for perfection, you’ll only be disappointed. Enough of playing around with several options and the hearts of several sisters! The sisters are also tired of you la!

2. You are paralyzed because you cannot accept advice (prophecy)

“And Isaac called Jacob, and blessed him, and charged him, and said unto him, Thou shalt not take a wife of the daughters of Canaan. Arise, go to Padanaram, to the house of Bethuel thy mother’s father; and take thee a wife from thence of the daughters of Laban thy mother’s brother. “ – Genesis 28:1-2

Jacob followed the advice of his father and chose a wife from their family. Many brothers struggle because they can’t accept wise counsel and obey it. They have been told to marry from the church and they know about the consequences of not doing so, but they still wish to go ahead and make their own mistakes. Most brothers cannot reconcile the fact that prophecy from their father or pastor is an inspired message from God. Be willing to flow and trust the prophecy!

3. You are paralyzed because you have let the past cripple you

Jacob was not deterred by his mistake of marrying in the night. Brother, is it because of one past relationship that you are afraid to move forward? Have your parents’ bad example driven you into fear? Paul says forgetting the things behind him, he presses on toward the mark of the high calling. You must press on and forget past things to achieve anything high in this life!

4. You are paralyzed because of your pride.

Your pride is leading you to have false expectations. Nothing is good enough for you. But when you are humble, you appreciate and honor the sisters that God has brought your way. Jacob could have despised Rachel because she was taking care of her father’s sheep. She was not dressed in fancy clothes with a fresh hairstyle. It is your pride that makes you desire a woman who is overly concerned about her outward appearance. Brother, put God first and don’t be deceived by high and flashy things.

5. You are paralyzed because you are not being intentional

Jacob was extremely intentional in winning the beloved of his choice. Good things do not just fall off trees like fruits. Don’t be surprised if you have to work to win the attention, devotion and love of the sister God has prepared for you. Jacob rolled the stone off the well for Rachel. In addition, he worked 14 years in order to marry her! Don’t be surprised if you must roll of the stone of your family prejudice against your beloved. Don’t be surprised if you must wait for her to finish school or move to where you are to marry you. A virtuous woman is hard to find and her price is far above rubies. You must spend time to work on yourself, your spiritual life and your ability to be a leader and a breadwinner. You must spend time to pray and ask God for His perfect will, it will not just happen. You must pray till it happens!

Don’t be like the impotent man in John 5:7 who answered Jesus saying “Sir, I have no man, when the water is troubled, to put me into the pool:but while I am coming, another steppeth down before me.” 

Rise up and be a Jacob and take that which belongs to you! In Jesus’ name. And let the church (the brothers) say, AMEN!

Our Good Shepherd

And when you invite them to church, you’ve invited them into your life.
They’ve taken a seat in church, don’t be surprised when they take a seat in your house.
And when you ask them to follow you, be prepared to feed them.
And when they go missing, be ready to find them.
And when they make mistakes, be willing to teach them.
And when they fall in mud, have mercy and help to clean them.
You are showing them the way to the Savior’s heart
Allow them to by pass your heart as well
You are revealing to them Christ who died
So let them see your death as well
And when they picture Christ as a servant
Your face will come to mind
Keep them warm
Keep them laughing and filled with love
Keep them on the very same narrow path you are on
Keep them close
This is the work of the Great Beloved
Our Good Shepherd.

 

By: Xola Ntumy LCI Boston

CHARACTERISTICS OF A GODLY WOMAN

~ PREACHER’S CORNER ~

Paul Konadu ~ LCI Columbus, Ohio~

GOD DELIVERED ME

TESTIMONY TUESDAY

In 2010 I gave my life to Christ but I was still struggling with something’s in my walk with Christ. I was living two different lives. In church I was one person and out of church I was a whole other person. One day I met a guy that became a friend and one night I decided to accompany him to the studio. At the studio he kept prompting me to perform sexual acts on him. Since I was still in the world at that time fornication was something I was struggling with so usually for me at that time it was easy to sleep around with guys especially if they were good looking! For whatever reason though that night something told me not to fornicate with this particular guy, so I kept on telling him no. He was becoming aggressive at some point, like forcing my hand to touch his body, and etc. but I kept refusing and demanded him to take me home. After that he kept calling me and I ignored all his calls. My Reverend kept telling me to stop fornicating and although I was still fornicating I refused to sleep with this particular guy. Thank God I did not fornicate with that guy because recently I have found out that he had AIDS!!!! Wow (What a shock!) and I am GRATEFUL to GOD because he blinded me from that guy and it’s a blessing because for someone like me that used to love to fornicate I did not sleep with that guy even though he happened to be my type. I’m so thankful for the voice of the HOLY SPIRIT that was telling me to stay away from this guy. I just want to encourage us young people to WAIT until we get married, WAIT for God to lead you to the right person, WAIT for counseling, because the Devil’s plan for our lives is to STEAL, KILL, and DESTROY our lives John 10:10!!! But God has given us life so no weapon shall proper against us. I pray that we will all take heed to this testimony because even I am encouraged and still praising God for delivering me because I could have been walking around with aids but, BY THE GRACE OF GOD I’m still here. AMEN!

-Anonymous LCI